Things They Like #15: Goodwill

Oh, Goodwill. Where else could unpopular girls find their old man sweaters, their ugly floral skirts, and their Elton John 1996 Concert t-shirts?

Nowhere. Except maybe somewhere kind of expensive. But then unpopular girls would miss out on that thrifty, self-satisfied feeling that comes with saving someone else's garbage from being thrown out again. And not even just garments! Goodwill (and to a lesser extent, Value Village and the Salvation Army) also accommodates unpopular girls in their never-ending thirst for obsolete technologies, ugly knick-knacks, and children's VHS tapes. Type-writers galore, ask an unpopular girl to go to Goodwill with you, and with $40 or less, she will purchase her wardrobe for the next four years, as well as a 1991 Karaoke Hits Tape. Who said you can't buy happiness?